Today’s fun TMI Tuesday questions were submitted by Jz from “A Reluctant Bitch” blog. Enjoy!
Love, Hate, and Guilty Secrets. We never mind telling people about things we love or hate, but how about the things we love, but would hate for anyone to find out about?
Well, it’s time to free yourself of that fear!
For each of the categories below, list one thing you love, one that you hate, and then, take a deep breath and tell us something you hate to admit you love.
You’ll feel better for it!
I love almost everything. Seriously, it's not the type of thing that I can narrow down. Asking me to choose one favorite food is like asking me to choose one favorite movie. Or, in keeping with the spirit of this blog, one favorite sex act. Which, if I recall correctly, I've been asked to choose during some past installment of TMI Tuesday. It's true, though: I love food. Steak, pizza, hamburgers, fried chicken, baby-back ribs, lobster, hot dogs, tacos, clam chowder, crab cakes, burritos, pasta, ice cream. Just pick one. The way to a man's heart is through his stomach, after all. The way to a man's cock? Through his pants, if he's wearing any. (I'm not.)
I hate eggs. Since I was a child, I've never been a fan. This makes going out to breakfast problematic, as just about any breakfast dish served in a restaurant incoporates or includes eggs in some way. I suppose I could have them make a substitution, but let's face it, International House of Pancakes isn't going to substitute a New York Steak for the two eggs any style I don't want. I should probably just order the steak.
My guilty secret is Taco Bell. It's not nutritious. It isn't really even Mexican food. But there's something about what's on their menu that makes hitting a Taco Bell drive-thru after a late night of drinking with friends a no-brainer. Hell, I'll even eat there sober, though I won't necessarily feel happy about it afterwards.
I love plain white T-shirts. They're comfortable, versatile, and say so much without saying anything at all. Dem Franchize Boyz said it best: "Fuck a throwback, I look clean in my white T." In fact, the humble white T-shirt is the only thing that can redeem the piece of clothing I hate.
I hate V-necks, unless we're talking about a V-neck sweater with a white T-shirt underneath.
My guilty secret is actually not a secret. I frequently wear semi-blasphemous T-shirts to church events we attend with Jill's family.
That, or my banana hammock.
I love non-fiction of all kinds: Reference works, history books, how-tos, exposés and tell-alls, and hell, cookbooks too. Nothing against fiction - I've read plenty of it - but given the choice I'll go with non-fiction almost every time.
I hate novelizations of the movies I grew up loving. I was an insatiable reader as a child and a teenager, and liked the idea of getting a bit of background information on the movies I enjoyed. Unfortunately, most novelizations, if not all, are crap, and some actually manage to diminish the films themselves.
My guilty secret is my hitherto unknown love of Archie comics, in particular the Betty and Veronica characters. There's no way in hell I would have let anyone know I read these when I was a kid. I wasn't interested in the storylines whatsoever; I just liked the idea of banging both of them at the same time. Or, you know, I would have if they were human beings and not comic book characters.
Makes sense now, doesn't it?
I love "Keep Ya Head Up" by 2Pac. It's such a socially-relevant, empowering feminist anthem that belies the usual attitudes of gangsta rap. In this day and age, we need more young urban voices speaking words like these to an audience that may not fully understand how valuable women are to society.
Who did you think I was talking about?
I hate the music associated with most of the children's shows my daughter watches, in particular anything from Dora the Explorer. Dora is the bane of my existence, and I'm convinced that her theme song will play in my head long after my daughter outgrows her.
My guilty secret is Raffi's "Bananaphone". I love it, I frequently make Jill listen to it on long car trips, and because of that she says I have to list it here.
If this guy really tried to "call the White House [and] have a chat" he'd be in Guantanamo Bay faster than you can say "Bananaphone".*
I love too many movies to choose just one. And you know this; you read my answer to #1. To name a very small sampling: Raiders of the Lost Ark, Pulp Fiction, The Big Lebowski, Dazed & Confused, The Godfather, Aliens, Snatch, Bride of Frankenstein, Goodfellas, Harold and Maude, Clerks, Monty Python and the Holy Grail, Taxi Driver, The Empire Strikes Back, Ed Wood, Office Space, Swingers, and Casablanca. Like I said, pick one.
I hate Forrest Gump. Yeah, I know that no matter what else I say here, this is what people will mention in their comments. I didn't care for the ideology behind the film, which to me says that men and women should fall into a predetermined place in society and be rewarded or punished accordingly. You may say that I'm reading too much into the film - many have - but conservative groups have claimed Forrest Gump for their own.
My guilty secret is undoubtedly '50s-'60s B-grade sci-fi and horror films. I love these schlocky spectacles featuring bargain basement special effects, ridiculous spacemen, inexplicable monsters, and performers who either underact or overact, but never quite hit the mark, so to speak.
From the 1958 Bert I. Gordon hit Attack of the Pubic Lice
6. TV Show
I love very little of the current crop of television. Sorry, let me rephrase that. I watch very little of the current crop of television, and I love even less. To me, television reached its zenith with The Wire, which aired its final episode in 2008. Though I've seen quite a few complex, entertaining, and even enlightening television shows in the years since, nothing even comes close. Nor, do I suspect, will it ever.
I hate formulaic police procedurals. Doesn't matter if it's one of the various iterations of Law & Order or CSI, or one-offs like Cold Case, Criminal Minds, or NCIS, I can't watch shows that present police work as simple and efficient, implying that all parties work together as a well-meaning and cohesive unit for the betterment of society. Nor can I believe in protagonists as unflawed as David Caruso's Horatio Caine, a one-dimensional action figure of a character. I liked Caruso much better as Detective Kelly on NYPD Blue.
My guilty secret is Pee-Wee's Playhouse. You got a problem with that?
7. Celebrity Crush
I love being so far out of the loop with regard to current pop culture that I can't think of anyone to name. Even if I could, I tend not to crush on celebrities. They're totally unrelatable to me, as I don't read tabloids, follow celebrity Twitter feeds, watch reality TV, or remotely give a tumbling fuck about any of these people.
I hate the way certain of my friends look down their nose at me because I can't tell Current Trending Hollywood Starlet A from Current Trending Hollywood Starlet B. Hey, fuck you. While you're keeping up with Hollywood, I'm getting shit done.
My guilty secret is Asia Carrera. See? The celebrities about whom I do give a shit are porn stars. Retired porn stars, even. That's how out of the loop I am.
8. Music Group
I love The Red Hot Chili peppers. I'm a huge fan of their music, and I've seen them every time they've toured since 'ninety-six.
I hate Third-Eye Blind. I dug Semi-Charmed Life, which was their first release from their debut album. "Graduate" was pretty good too. I thought "Never Let You Go" was decent. But every other song of theirs that got major radio play - sorry, I never liked them enough to buy or even download their albums - was a major whinefest. I'm thinking primarily of "Jumper" and "How's It Going to Be", both of which got more airplay in 1997 and 1998 than all their other stuff combined.
My guilty secret is probably Creed. I'm not into Christian rock - to be fair, I had no idea they were Christian rock until they'd been around a few years - but I like a good number of their songs.
Creed or this guy.
9. Sports Team
I love the San Francisco 49ers. They are my team, and there is nothing more that needs to be said.
I hate the Oakland Raiders. Sorry, but you just can't like the Niners and the Raiders. It's a classic sports rivalry. You pick your side and you stick with it. End of story.
My guilty secret is something I can't think of right now. Are there sports-related guilty pleasures? If the XFL still existed and I somehow found it worth watching, I guess I could say that. But if the XFL still existed and I watched it, I sure as hell wouldn't tell anybody.
Sex Position or Sex Act or fetish
I love sex.
I hate not having sex.
My guilty secret is I occasionally masturbate. Shhh! Don't tell anybody.
I love potatoes. I'll eat them almost any way you can think of. Mashed, baked, broiled, french fries, potato chips. Anything but scalloped.
I hate liver. Not just the taste and the smell but the color and the texture as well. It's the one food I hate more than any other.
I don't care if he does have Chianti, I am not letting this guy cook for me.
My guilty secret is Kentucky Fried Chicken. I don't eat there often, but just the thought of their extra crispy chicken breast and mashed potatoes and gravy makes me wet. Despite the fact that it's chicken, I am under no delusion that it's healthy. That's why Kentucky Fried Chicken is a once-in-a-very-great-while treat.
I love flowy blouses that accentuate my breasts. I like looking like I have a nice rack sometimes.
I hate pajamas. They are way too constricting and hot to wear at night. I would much rather be naked. I hate it when we have to share a hotel room with family, or more often when we stay over Jack's parents' house. I have to wear pajamas, or at the very least have them nearby so I can put them on when I leave the room in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom or check on the baby.
My guilty secret is I love wearing sexy lingerie under my work clothes. Though I have no way of knowing for sure, I'd bet that most of my teacher colleagues don't have thongs and demi cup bras under their clothing.
I love mysteries and detective novels by authors such as James Patterson, Michael Connelly, and Janet Evanovich.
I hate the Twilight series. I got halfway through the first book and quit reading. To be honest, I knew it wasn't for me way before that.
My guilty secret is erotica. Well, it's not a secret to anyone who reads this blog, but I'm sure there are those who would be very surprised to find out that a bookcase in our bedroom is filled with books on human sexuality and erotic fiction.
I love just about anything by Billy Joel. I've been a fan of his for years, and I enjoy his entire catalog. In fact, he's the only recording artist I've seen in concert more than once.
I hate country. There are a few random country songs that I like, but it is definitely not my preferred genre.
My guilty secret is Neil Diamond's album You Don't Bring Me Flowers, because it brings back happy memories of car rides with my family.
I love Field of Dreams. I enjoy the story, I like the characters, and it always makes me cry.
I hate Cry Baby, John Waters' 1990 film starring Johnny Depp. My friends and I attended a free screening when it was in its theatrical release, and the projector broke down halfway through it. We really should have left right then and there, but they eventually fixed it. I found it to be a horrible waste of time, and to this day I mourn those couple wasted hours that I'll never get back.
Somehow, I have no problem with John Waters' earlier, less-mainstream works.
My guilty secret is Poison Ivy, a TV movie from 1985 starring Michael J. Fox and Nancy McKeon. I watched it on TV when it originally aired, taped it during a repeat broadcast, and watched it over and over again. A few years ago I found the tape and watched it again. It's still as great as it was the first time, more than twenty-five years ago. I'm not sure why I love it so much, but I do. I've got to have it transferred to DVD.
6. TV Show
I love police procedurals. The same shows that Jack hates, I watch as much as I can. Sometimes, especially after a night of little sleep and a long day of work, I really want an easy-to-follow story that I don't have to think much about and that is completely resolved in an hour. My favorite police procedural at the moment is Castle. I love Nathan Fillion.
I hate CatDog, a late 1990s cartoon that aired on Nickelodeon. The premise, involving a cat and dog hybrid with two heads, always seemed so stupid to me.
My guilty secret is probably Pretty Little Liars. It's such a trashy soap, but I like it. That, or old game show reruns on Game Show Network.
7. Celebrity Crush
I love Mark Ruffalo. You people should know this by now!
I hate anyone who's ever appeared on Jersey Shore, or for that matter most people whose claim to fame is having appeared on a reality TV series. I don't believe in glorifying sleaze or stupidity, so I'll pick any one of these losers.
My guilty secret is Joshua Jackson. I followed him from Dawson's Creek to Fringe, and even watched the Mighty Ducks movies because he was in them.
Here's Pacey, back when he was the captain of a scrappy team of hockey-playing misfits.
8. Music Group
I love The Beach Boys. Their music is fun and happy, and reminds me of simpler times, and summer days at the beach. Party anthems like "Barbara Ann" and "California Girls" never fail to put me in a good mood.
I hate techno music. I know it's not a group, but there aren't many groups that I actively dislike so I'm going with the entire techno genre. It's loud, repetitive, headache-inducing, and it goes on and on all night until the drugs wear off and you wake up in an alley behind the club.
My guilty secret is The Barenaked Ladies. I like their mellow style of alternative rock. I never said I was cutting-edge when it comes to music.
I prefer these barenaked ladies though.
9. Sports Team
I love the 49ers. I grew up in a very large, very passionate football family, and Sundays were spent watching football, either on TV or at the park. When the Niners made it to the Super Bowl (and inevitably won every single time), my neighborhood always came together, and families gathered at the homes of whoever had the biggest televisions to watch with excitement. I used to love tailgating with my family in the parking lot at Candlestick, and when I was around seventeen I got a job there selling concessions. The Niners have always been my favorite team, and they always will be.
I hate the Raiders. Forget the fact that there is a long-standing San Francisco-Oakland rivalry, I take the defection of several of my favorite players (including Roger Craig, Ronnie Lott, and Jerry Rice) from the Niners to the Raiders very personally.
Here's another reason.
My guilty secret is I love it when we're in the park and we see old Italian men playing bocce ball. There's something so cool about watching them standing around the court, laughing and sharing stories while they play. I imagine my brothers standing around a similar court in thirty years, having the same kind of fun.
Sex Position or Sex Act or fetish
I love doggy style.
I hate breath play. I know it's not unsafe if done with a trusted partner who knows what he or she is doing, but it still scares me. I once nearly drowned, and the thought of my airway constricting is not something I would care to revisit on a recreational basis. A lot of my orgasms do involve shortness of breath, though it isn't as extreme as having my breathing deliberately restricted.
I know it intensifies the orgasm. I just wouldn't trust someone like Homer to do it properly.
My guilty secret is tasting Jack's cum after he ejaculates inside me. I'll slurp it up right off of his cock, but I really love it when he fingers my pussy after he cums and lets me lick them clean.
How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!
*I wrote that joke in 2008, when Bush was in the White House and Camp X-Ray was still an operational entity. I guess it didn't age well.