TMI Tuesday: Dating

Disclaimer: We are married. We don't do much dating anymore. For the purposes of this TMI Tuesday entry, all of our answers are posted with the understanding that they pertain to our single days.

Jack's Answers

1. You’re on a speed date. You’ve got 7 minutes with the potential partner. You already know the person’s name. What are the first three questions you would ask?

Are you really a woman? Wait! Please come back... Okay, all kidding aside, I might ask her why she left her previous job, what her long-term career goals are, and whether she prefers working alone, or with other people. I hear that speed dating is a lot like conducting a job interview.

2. Have you ever participated in speed dating? Did you get a regular date/second date out of it?

Never. I would look on the practice with disdain, but my wife has speed-dated so needless to say I think it's a phenomenal way to meet people. EDIT: Jill has reminded me for the umpteenth time that what I always think was speed dating was actually a party sponsored by match.com before we met. I'm not changing my answer, as I think it's funny.

3. Do you participate in online dating? How many dates have you had as a result of online dating sites/matches?

Yes I have, though not currently. There's no way I can guess how many dates I went on while dating in this fashion, but my marriage happens to be the product of an online date that went really, really well.

4. You are attracted to:

a. Who people are?

b. What people have?

c. What they can do?

Of the three, I will say mostly "a", followed by "c". "B" is less important, though not 100% unimportant.

5. What “little red flag” will cause you to end a date or immediately decide this person isn’t for you?

Little red flags: Showing up late without explanation (if we're meeting someplace), talking ad nauseum about her ex. If we're at a movie, talking during the movie or laughing obnoxiously/at inappropriate points. Medium red flags: Treating waitstaff poorly, kicking puppies. If we're at a movie, answerinig a cell phone call. Large red flags: Attempted or successful murder. If we're at a movie, attempting to record the movie for the purposes of piracy.

6. What do you feel you need to sacrifice or have sacrificed to be a part of a relationship?

Casual sex. Not everyone sacrifices this, but for most it is the price of admission into a stable relationship.

7. If you cooked for your date, what would you cook?

I love to cook. Depending on the preferences of my date, I might make fish tacos, steaks, or some variety of elaborate salad or pasta dish. (Jill says I should have answered either "Cook? Fuck that. She cooks for me or we go out", or "I would feed her hot, spicy sausage." She is also displeased to hear about my fondess for making steak for dates, as I don't believe I made her a steak until we were a few months in.)

8. At the end of a first date, how would you kiss your date?

a. Press your lips against theirs

b. Gentle kiss on the cheek

c. Lots o’ tongue, like you’re on a tonsil exploration

d. I don’t kiss on the first date

I'm going to attempt to kiss her on the mouth unless she deflects my attempt with her cheek (or open hand). If I am not deflected, and if her body language suggests that it may be fortuitous, I may try to introduce tongue into the situation.

Bonus: You just put up a profile on a dating site. You must describe yourself in 10 words or less. What are your 10 words?

"Sexy, successful, witty guy will make your dreams come true." (When I read this to Jill, she asked if I said "witty", or "woody." I would have mentioned my woody if I had, say, fifteen words.) Also, though not a description, I'm tempted to go with "Prepare to take your first step into a larger world."

Jill's Answers

1. You’re on a speed date. You’ve got 7 minutes with the potential partner. You already know the person’s name. What are the first three questions you would ask?

Are you married? Any kids? What do you do for a living?

2. Have you ever participated in speed dating? Did you get a regular date/second date out of it?

No. Although my husband says I have, I have not. He must be thinking of one of his other wives.

3. Do you participate in online dating? How many dates have you had as a result of online dating sites/matches?

I have participated in online dating. As for how many people I've dated in this way, I'd say about five.

4. You are attracted to:

a. Who people are?

b. What people have?

c. What they can do?

Definitely "a".

5. What “little red flag” will cause you to end a date or immediately decide this person isn’t for you?

Ditching me. That's actually probably a big red flag. I guess I would say being a lousy kisser, as superficial as that sounds.

6. What do you feel you need to sacrifice or have sacrificed to be a part of a relationship?

I don't feel as though I have sacrificed anything in order to be in a relationship with Jack. I know that sounds corny, but I really have everything that I want and need.

7. If you cooked for your date, what would you cook?

Probably chicken cordon bleu. It's one of my favorite recipes to cook, and as they say, the way to a man's heart is through his stomach. I made it for Jack during the early stages of our relationship, and look at us now. However, I see that one of the things he brags about having made for dates is steak. He didn't make me any fucking steak until we were well into our relationship. That should have been one of my little red flags.

8. At the end of a first date, how would you kiss your date?

a. Press your lips against theirs

b. Gentle kiss on the cheek

c. Lots o’ tongue, like you’re on a tonsil exploration

d. I don’t kiss on the first date

Definitely not "d", because I think kissing on the first date is important. As I said above, if the kiss doesn't feel right, I might not go on a second date. I would probably go with "a", unless I was feeling bold and decided to turn "a" into "c". I frequently feel bold, thus I have done this.

Bonus: You just put up a profile on a dating site. You must describe yourself in 10 words or less. What are your 10 words?

Sexy baggage-free chick who loves to have fun.