The Naughty Hangout: Summer Fun

This week, the sole theme at The Naughty Hangout is "Vacation".  My summer vacation starts very soon, and I plan to spend as much of it as possible lounging by the pool, showing off my pretty pink toes, and my pretty pink nipples.

Go see who else is being naughty this week!

-Jill

Finale

I hear the curtain slide along the rod.  Once you're in, it slides back.

Your breath is hot.  You kiss me, sucking softly on the back of my neck even as I lather up my hair.  The shampoo forms a thick foam beneath my fingers as I dig down to my scalp.  

"Let me help you with that."  You move close to me, your breasts pressing against my back.  You put your hands over my own, twenty digits moving in concert through my hair.  When my hair is flocked with soft, bubbly lather, you turn me around and we kiss.

I can taste your hunger, your urgency.  Your mouth presses against mine, our lips melding as though we are of the same flesh.  Our tongues swim back and forth from one mouth to the other as the hot spray cascades over us.  The water agitates the shampoo in my hair, washing it over my shoulders and down my chest.  You gently push me back into the water, rinsing me clean.

Now it's my turn.  I pick up the bottle of body wash and squeeze some of the blue liquid onto my hands.  I return the bottle to the edge of the tub and soap up your full-round breasts.  My touch stiffens your nipples, leaving them flecked with lather.  From there, my hands travel over your stomach, seeking warmth between your thighs.

You open to my touch.  I kiss your neck softly as my fingers find your engorged bud.  You moan with delight as I trace circles around it, feeling it throb eagerly.  You sway your hips, your legs undulating around my hand.  I return my other hand to your breast, squeezing and pinching your nipple as the first waves of your orgasm overcome you.  As I tug, you writhe against the heel of my hand, bracing yourself against me for a very intense climax.

When your moans subside, you drop slowly to your knees.  Your fingers  stroke my chest even as you take my hardness deep into your mouth.  While you focus on me, I shampoo your hair.  I know how much excitement you get from feeling my fingers - or anyone's - moving along your scalp, and I imagine that you are pleasuring yourself.

I continue to work my soapy hands through your hair, knowing it turns you on.  I picture your fingers parting your pretty lips just as my own did earlier.  I picture you slipping two and then three fingers inside, while rubbing your needy clit with an able thumb.  Between the thoughts in my head, and your lips wrapped around my cock, the stimulation is too much.  I take your hair in my fist, gripping tightly, and pull your mouth further onto me as I ejaculate.  The sounds of my pleasure echo off the cold tile walls.

You stand up, swallowing heartily, and step under the spray to rinse the soap and shampoo from your body.  We kiss, and then we wrap ourselves in towels and dry off.

***

This marks the final installment of the Wanton Wednesday meme.  We have enjoyed participating over the past few months, as the relatively unstructured format of Wanton Wednesday inspired us to blog a bit more than we might have otherwise.  Thanks to Dangerous Lilly for hosting Wanton Wednesday, and through it, for introducing us to a plethora of exciting bloggers.

It is our intention to continue to post something vaguely erotic every Wednesday in addition to our weekly Retro HNT picture.  But now it'll be without the Wanton Wednesday label.  We will likely continue these posts as part of Rebel's Wicked Wednesday meme.

Spectacles Roaming Sub Text: Honey Flick's Tale Our First Time Fun in the Park All By Myself A Long-Awaited Rendezvous A Long-Awaited Rendezvous, Part 3 The Performance of a Lifetime Shush Green Our First-Fuck Anniversary The Hottest Girl I Never Fucked; or Almost-Sex in the Infancy of the Internet On Display Last Night, Part 2 On a Break Bedding Christine

Retro HNT: Washed Out

"Washed Out", posted July 1, 2010

In 2010, we posted fifty-two consecutive weeks of pictures at OHNT.  We're posting them on our blog, one per week.  They can be found here, along with background information and all the comments they received.

TMI Tuesday: May 29, 2012 - It's just a fantasy

Jack's Answers

1. If your lover was turned on by forced feminization would you participate (giving or receiving)?

*forced feminization is the practice of enforcing activities on a male, which are typically associated with women, to make him submissive. For example: wearing lingerie, heels, make-up.

Of course I would.  A big part of any relationship, whether sexual or otherwise, is compromise.  I believe in give and take, and understand that sometimes one must (or at least should) indulge his or her partner's sexual kinks, provided that they are reasonable.  (The parameters of "reasonable" may vary.)  I'm not turned on by forced feminization - as far as I know Jill isn't either - but I am seriously turned on by the idea of having a partner who is completely satisfied in every possible way.  So if this was Jill's thing, yes, I would participate.

It worked out pretty well for this guy.

2. When you have sexual dreams or fantasies that are aggressive or cruel, does it worry you?
I don't really have sexual dreams or fantasies that are cruel.  I tend to be dominant, so my dreams and fantasies - as well as my reality - often involve me taking control.  While I might classify this as aggressive, it's never cruel, and in fact the notion of non-consent as part of sex play is something that doesn't really appeal to me; I am hard-pressed to take the aggression to that level even when it's requested.  However, even if my sexual fantasies were full of the sort of belligerence and hostility that would make a psychiatrist see dollar signs, I doubt it would worry me as I have no trouble separating fantasy and reality.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have matters to attend to.

3. Tell us your hottest filthiest fantasy, right now, in 100 words or less. This is the fantasy about your desires that you probably never share, maybe they even go against your morals, or are societal taboos.

Jill.  Two of her sisters.  (She knows which ones.)  Lube.  Three vibrators.  Two dildos.  One harness.  Me.  Camera.  And then I fuck all three of them.

4. Which super hero would you like to have sex with? Why?

a. Aquaman

b. Superman

c. Wonder Woman

d. She-Ra

None.  As a lifelong Marvel Comics fan I take umbrage over the fact that no Marvel superheroes are represented here.  I mean, seriously - three DC characters, two of them male; and a He-Man ripoff designed to sell toys to little girls in the 1980s?  I'm no DC fan, but at least include Catwoman; fanboys always gravitate to the leather-clad bad girl.  Given that The Avengers, a film based on a Marvel Comics property, spent three weeks at the top of the box office this month, you'd think they'd throw in Thor and Black Widow.  As for my answer, I'm definitely going outside the box here.  Once upon a time I would have been inclined to pick the X-Men's Rogue, who was my superhero crush back in my hardcore comic geek days.  Unfortunately, the fact that you can't physically touch her without getting your shit fucked up would be a big deterrent for me.  These days, I'd be inclined to pick Storm, particularly as drawn by Dave Cockrum in her debut in Giant-Size X-Men #1; or by Jim Lee in 1991's X-Men #1.  Though I'll admit it's an iconic look, I was never particularly wowed by Paul Smith's interpretation of the character, which saw her clad in black leather and sporting a mohawk.  That said, I wouldn't kick Mohawk Storm out of bed.  Were I forced to choose a character from the above list, I suppose I would go with She-Ra, if only because she carries a weapon called the Sword of Protection.  Presumably this means we wouldn't have to use condoms or birth control.  Anyway, apologies for the geek-out.  I presume Jill's answer won't be so obsessive-compulsive and reflexively irate.

5. Knowing there’s a hot young couple in the adjoining hotel room, would you press your ear against the wall to hear the action on the other side?

I hope that I wouldn't have to!  One of the things that really turns us on is listening (or watching) someone without their knowledge.  I'm not talking about peeping through a window, as we would never deliberately invade someone's privacy.  But were we in a hotel room and there was some manner of noisy sex occurring on the other side of the wall, we would definitely use it as fuel for our own lovemaking.  (Well, provided the baby wasn't with us.)  Actually, last month when Jill and I spent a couple days alone in a hotel, we found ourselves having very vigorous, very noisy sex at around 9:30 AM.  Apparently we were so loud that our neighbors didn't need to press their ears against the wall.  And judging by the (non-sexual) pounding coming from their room, they weren't pleased.

We, on the other hand, most definitely were.

6. Do you think the lure to live out sexual fantasies or have sex frequently is amplified by technology? Briefly explain.

Yes I do.  I think that technology, especially in the form of social networking, is a good way of sharing information.  We have been told that our blog, and some of the things we've tweeted, have inspired others to follow our lead.  Likewise, some of the things that we have read on the blogs of others have helped us broaden our own horizons.

Bonus: Describe your fantasy life in three (3) words.

Really fucking active.

As opposed to my real life.

Jill's Answers

1. If your lover was turned on by forced feminization would you participate (giving or receiving)?

*forced feminization is the practice of enforcing activities on a male, which are typically associated with women, to make him submissive. For example: wearing lingerie, heels, make-up.

Forced feminization isn't something I'm interested in.  But if Jack was into it, I would gladly indulge his fantasy.  After all, I have indulged many of his fantasies (and he has indulged many of my own).  For all I know I might be turned on by such a scenario, especially if he got a lot of pleasure from it.  It might become a regular thing, and who knows?  Maybe he looks amazing in one of my lacy thongs.

What do you know? I was right.

2. When you have sexual dreams or fantasies that are aggressive or cruel, does it worry you?

I can't recall any dreams or fantasies that I've had that have been cruel.  I've had some sexual dreams that have involved BDSM, and some of them were very aggressive, but I was always the recipient of the aggression and not the aggressor.  In these dreams I was blindfolded and restrained, and the sex was rough though it wasn't quite a rape scenario.  I remember being totally unafraid and even excited.  I knew that I wasn't going to be seriously harmed in any way.  If my dreams or fantasies involved cruelty I don't think it would worry me.  These are not scenarios in which Jack and I actively participate.  I love being restrained and spanked, but right now that is the extent of my BDSM interests.

3. Tell us your hottest filthiest fantasy, right now, in 100 words or less. 

This is the fantasy about your desires that you probably never share, maybe they even go against your morals, or are societal taboos.

Having sex with Jack, my college roommate’s husband, and my sister-in-law.  Sucking both guys’ cocks while she eats my pussy.  Fingering her G-spot while she fingers mine.  Both of us cumming and lapping up the other’s juices.  Sixty-nining with her while the guys fuck us.  Being double-penetrated by the guys while my sister-in-law and I make out.  Having her sit on my face so I can eat her pussy and ass while they fuck me.  All four of us climaxing simultaneously in a glorious cacophony of moans, grunts and “oh fuck”s.

Either that or D.V.D.A. 

4. Which super hero would you like to have sex with? Why?
a. Aquaman
b. Superman
c. Wonder Woman
d. She-Ra
When Super Friends was big in the late 1970s and early 1980s, I thought Aquaman was hot.  I know that I always go for tall, dark and handsome, but for some reason Aquaman turned me on.  When they redesigned him to look like a crazy mountain man with a scraggly beard and a nasty spear thing for a hand, that killed my girl boner.  To this day, though, I love having sex in water, whether it's a pool, the shower, a hot tub, a lake, or other body of water.  I've never had sex in the ocean, but I bet it's fabulous.

I bet Superman would be a pretty fun fuck, because he's the Man of Steel and that would probably apply to his cock.  On the other hand, the guy can fly around the entire planet in seconds, so I'm guessing he doesn't take his time.  Also, Jack reminds me of this discussion from Mallrats:

Wonder Woman is pretty sexy, and I bet her golden lasso would really come in handy.  I've never tried rope bondage before, but if she wanted to tie my arms behind my back and fuck me with a strap-on, I'm not going to tell her no.  Plus, having sex in her invisible plane would be a lot of fun.  I always wondered what good an invisible plane was if it didn't render the people flying in it invisible also.  Basically it just looks like she can fly, but in a sitting position.

She-Ra?  She's He-Man's sister or something, right?

Okay, I'd fuck her.  Image courtesy of Johnny Haradrim 

 5. Knowing there’s a hot young couple in the adjoining hotel room, would you press your ear against the wall to hear the action on the other side?
I don't think I would put my ear to the wall, but if I happened to overhear what they were doing, I'm going to enjoy it, not bury my head under the pillows.  I'd like to think, however, that I would be having even louder, more amazing sex than the people on the other side of the wall, so we might drown them out.  Actually, I like the idea of having a little contest to see which of us is louder.  Or better still, how about if we each move to our respective balconies so we can watch each other too?

6. Do you think the lure to live out sexual fantasies or have sex frequently is amplified by technology? Briefly explain.
I do believe that technology has expanded my sexual knowledge base.  Reading blogs regularly has introduced me to and familiarized me with all sorts of new sexual practices.  By reading about what other people enjoy we can decide whether these practices are suitable for us.  Also our blog has given us a place to discuss and explore our sexual selves.  Sex isn't something that we can discuss candidly in a social setting with friends and relatives, so we appreciate the opportunity that blogging affords us.  Although I feel that people would be having sex without much of the technology that faciliates it nowadays, I do like the fact that the internet enables us to share this side of ourselves with people half a world away.

And let's not forget about sex robots.

Bonus: Describe your fantasy life in three (3) words.
Sensual, erotic, passionate.

How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Jill's Look Back at Masturbation Month

Although it isn't over yet, we thought this would be an appropriate place to reflect on Masturbation Month, as well as masturbation in general.

For those not in the know, Masturbation Month began in San Francisco in 1995 as a response to the dismissal of Surgeon General Joycelyn Elders following controversial comments she made, namely that masturbation should be part of sex education.  Seventeen years later, the only thing about Dr. Elders' statement that seems even remotely controversial is the bit about sex education.  Didn't the religious right kill that off?

Created by renowned San Francisco, California adult retailer Good Vibrations, Masturbation Month is an event promoting masturbation as a healthy part of human development.  Masturbation isn't something about which one should feel ashamed, nor is it merely a consolation prize when partnered sex isn't an option.  Setting aside an entire month to celebrate the most gratifying activity in which one person can engage alone raises awareness and removes the stigma from self-love.

Though we have long been aware of Masturbation Month, this may have been the first year that we made a conscious effort to masturbate at least once every single day.  So far we have been successful.  Generally our daily masturbation has occurred when we were alone, though we've counted solo masturbation that occurs as part of our sex play and leads to orgasm as well.  We did not count any instances of Jack fingering or fisting me, nor did we count any handjobs that I gave him.  (Actually I didn't give him any.  When my hand is on his cock, my mouth usually follows.)

As I've stated elsewhere on this blog, I try to masturbate in the shower every weekday morning before work, as I find that it puts me in a good frame of mind and makes me better able to tackle what is lately a difficult and stressful day.  Jack generally masturbates immediately before or immediately following his morning shower, as having a baby constantly underfoot can be a real boner-killer, and when Jack takes a shower the baby is usually in her playpen or otherwise occupied.  She's still noisy, constantly singing or talking, but Jack is very proud of the fact that when he's in a heightened state of arousal he can almost completely tune her out.

We're both very open about masturbation.  I masturbated for Jack fairly early into our sexual relationship.  It wasn't always so easy for me to be that honest with the men I slept with, certainly not early on, but Jack made it very easy for me to relax and not worry about judgment.  As for Jack, he doesn't masturbate for me as often as I'd like him to, but that's probably because I'm usually way too occupied with having him inside me to worry about getting a show.  But I do love to watch.

When I was young I masturbated primarily using my fingers.  I always enjoyed the slow, steady touch, gradually increasing in speed and pressure as my orgasm built.  I would usually draw circles around my clit, and just before orgasm hit I would move my fingers to my clit.  This became my favorite way to cum, and to this day direct pressure during climax never disappoints me.

I got my first vibrator when I was twenty-three.    It was a bullet with a cord attached to a control box.  I remember driving into San Francisco to go to Good Vibrations since I was worried about someone I knew seeing me walk into the seedy local porn shop in my neighborhood.  I made sure to hit the ATM on the way to Good Vibrations so that I could pay for my purchase without using a credit card.  I even bought the expensive batteries they sell so that I could try my toy out on the way home.  I stopped at a gas station and slipped the bullet into my panties.  I ran the cord out of my shorts and placed the control box into my pocket.  I was very glad that the top I was wearing was long enough to hide the cord completely.  I placed the control on the lowest setting and was on my way.

It was a very fun ride home, obviously.  I managed to keep the toy buzzing inside me for the entire ride without climaxing, which was probably a good idea considering that I was driving a car.  My orgasms tend to be very intense, eyes-roll-back-in-my-head kinds of things, and the last thing my parents would have wanted to hear was that their oldest daughter crashed her car because she was masturbating behind the wheel.

By the time I got home my panties were thoroughly soaked.  I should point out that "home" was my parents' house, where I was staying for the weekend.  As soon as I got in, I ran upstairs to finish what I had started.  I turned the remote up to its highest level, closed my eyes, and lost myself in a fantasy.  At some point during my exploration my mom walked in to ask me a question.  On its highest setting, the toy was very loud, so I fumbled to turn the toy off and answer her question so she'd get the hell out of my room.  I don't think she ever realized what I was doing.  After she left, it took me forever to get back on track and finally cum.

Pictured: About a third of the toys I own, and the ones I use most frequently.

Over the years, I have owned numerous rabbits, bullets, G-spot vibrators, regular vibrators, and even a Fuji massager that you would wear on your finger.  My favorite toy out of the many I own is the Eroscillator Jack bought me for Christmas the year before we got married.  It includes numerous attachments for a variety of sensations.  A close second is my current rabbit, which is a favorite when I want to get off while sucking Jack's cock.  I don't own a dildo, so it's the toy that feels most like an actual cock, and when it's inside me it feels like someone's actually fucking me.  It's probably the closest I'll get to my MFM fantasy without actually doing two guys.

Before I owned an actual vibrator, I used an electric toothbrush and a cucumber.  Possibly strangest of all, I used a Popsicle while soaking in a tepid bath.  It felt good, and my rationale was that if I was going to put something sticky into my pussy, I might as well be in the bathtub in order to help with cleanup.  I later found out that introducing sugar into the vagina can lead to a yeast infection, though fortunately I didn't get one.

Once I discovered Yahoo! Messenger, I quickly learned to type with one hand and pleasure myself with the other.  I really loved phone sex as well.  Sometimes I would find myself growing so aroused that all I had to do was grind my pelvis against my seat.  The circular movements I would make while gyrating against a chair or a couch cushion had the desired effect and I would climax almost instantly.  I didn't even have to use my hand, let alone a toy.

I enjoyed webcamming when I was single.  (For the record, I still enjoy it now that I am married.)  On rare occasions I have even performed in front of a live audience.  One thing I have never done that I would really like to do is watch a woman masturbate while she watches me do the same.  That's actually one of my favorite fantasies lately, and several times this month while masturbating I have imagined another woman on the bed beside me, or maybe sitting in a chair at the foot of the bed, enjoying the sights and sounds of my performance and giving me one of her own.  I get wet just thinking about it.

Although my orgasms range from mild shocks to tingling, toe-curling whole body orgasms, the intensity usually depends on how much buildup I experience before climaxing.  If I'm in a rush and I just want to get off, the orgasm may be quicker, more shallow, and less intense.  But if I have half an hour or more in which to spoil myself, the orgasm, or more frequently the orgasms, will be much more enjoyable, with intense waves of pleasure radiating from my core out to my extremities.  Sometimes I can feel it in my fingertips.

I didn't know how to find my G-spot until I met Jack.  I knew about the G-spot, I believed it existed, and I sure hoped that I had one, but I'd never been able to find my own, and none of my previous lovers had bothered to look.  The first time Jack and I talked about it, I was so excited to learn that he had found the G-spots of many of the women he'd been with.  I hoped he'd find mine!  He didn't make me wait very long.  The first time I squirted, with his fingers pressing against my G-spot and his tongue lapping at my clit, I was equally excited and embarrassed.  I completely soaked him.  My worry was short-lived, as he was just as excited as I was.

Once I knew what a G-spot orgasm felt like, I began to try and achieve them on my own.  Riding my rabbit worked very well, and after I'd had a few orgasms my clit would be much more sensitive, I'd be more relaxed, and squirting would come easier.  Owning a Liberator Throe also helped relax me.  Before we got ours, if I didn't have a towel under me I would hold back so I wouldn't leave a wet spot.  I get very turned on when I know I won't have to change the bedsheets.

Yesterday, Center for Sex & Culture held its annual Masturbate-a-Thon.  Much like any other event with a similar name (think marathon, walk-a-thon, bike-a-thon, swim-a-thon, or whatever), participants seek financial sponsorship and "come for a cause".  As the Center for Sex & Culture is a mere half hour from our home, Jack and I planned to attend, and even declared our intention to do so in a recent TMI Tuesday post.  After all, what better way to simultaneously indulge our voyeuristic and exhibitionistic sides?

While researching the event, we came across photos from past Masturbate-a-Thons.  On the one hand, the photos made it clear that the event was a fun, low-key event attracting masturbators of all persuasions, shapes, sizes, races, and ages.  That's definitely something we'd like to be a part of.  On the other hand, the fact that photos of the event exist were, to us, quite troubling as discretion is always at the forefront of our minds.  Sex is a huge part of our lives, and we enjoy thumbing our noses at the inexplicable taboo that surrounds it.  But given my profession, we have to seriously consider the possible consequences when planning something that is outside the boundaries of monogamous vanilla sex.

We inquired without response as to whether we could expect any kind of guarantee of privacy, though given the fact that everyone has a camera on their person at all times we were not optimistic.  As the event was divided into areas for males only, females only, and mixed-gender, we considered that perhaps there was an area where photography was specifically allowed and an area where it was prohibited.  We would have been okay with that, and would have stayed out of any part of the venue where our privacy might have been compromised.  Friends suggested donning masks, wigs, and/or dark glasses, and while this sounded like a feasible solution it also seemed to go against the spirit of the event.

We understand that the purpose of the Masturbate-a-Thon, as well as Masturbation Month, is to remove the shame and the stigma from something that is normal, positive, and even healthy.  We are one hundred percent in favor of changing society's outlook on self-pleasure, of making it something that people can and do talk about candidly, without needing to whisper or giggle.  We hope that someday attitudes will be such that we don't care whether we're photographed masturbating in a group setting.  But until that day, we probably won't be able to participate in such an event.

However, in the spirit of Masturbation Month, and because I was really looking forward to masturbating for an audience this weekend, I thought I would share a particularly intense orgasm.  Unlike many of our fellow bloggers, we've never posted an audio clip of me climaxing, as I'm kind of self-conscious about the sounds I make.  Yet now we're posting video.  We hope you enjoy it.

(The "running water" sound you hear starting at around the thirty-five-second mark is me ejaculating.  This video will not play on iPhone.  If it doesn't show up, you can view it here.)

-Jill

Mouthful Monday

'Nuff said.

-Jill

Sinful Sunday: Workout Clothes

Who says they can't be sexy?

See who else is being sinful at Molly's Daily Kiss!

Dirty Haiku #6

Jack at Sixteen


On a summer day
Two teens in an empty house
Fucked for the first time

Formspring Friday: Extremely Sexy

what's the most extreme sexual act/encounter you have both experienced together?

In case you're reading this blog for the first time, I need to state for the record that we're not exactly the sort who consider their sex life "extreme".  Varied?  Certainly.  Frequent?  No doubt.  Satisfying?  Even if you're new here, you must know the answer to that.  But not exactly extreme in the sense that we require a fifteen-thousand-foot freefall or a depth of a hundred and fifty fathoms below the surface of the ocean in order to get off.  Electric shock, humiliation, amputation - these are all legitimate kinks that add a significant boost to people's sex lives.  Not ours, though.

Make no mistake, we don't consider ourselves vanilla by any means.  We've always stated that kink is relative.  One person's wild and crazy new experience is another person's passé been-there-done-that.  Many of the people to whom we're closest would undoubtedly consider some of the sex we've had together to be far outside their comfort zone, if not flat-out wrong.  Fortunately neither of us lives our lives - sexual or otherwise - with anyone's approval in mind.  

Our brand of "extreme" really isn't all that extreme.  For us, stepping out of the realm of normalcy usually involves exhibitionism and voyeurism, and perhaps a little risk.  Webcamming, semi-public sex or masturbation, or on the rare occasion that the opportunity presents itself, having sex in close proximity as other people, whether we are actually interacting with them, or more likely just enjoying the voyeurism and exhibitionism.  It's not something that we do often enough for our liking.

The most extreme sexual act or encounter that we have experienced together was likely our October 2011 visit to Power Exchange, a sex club in San Francisco, California.  We'd gone there more or less on a lark, hoping to people-watch and then cross "visit a sex club" off of our bucket list before hopefully returning home full of sexual excitement, and fucking until the morning light.  We hadn't intended to actually have sex in front of a crowd of spectators, but we did.  And despite the fact that it wasn't our ideal experience at a sex club, it was a very fun evening.  You can read all about the night in question here.

If you want to ask us anything, drop us a line on Formspring, or use the handy Formspring widget on the right-hand side of our blog.  We like sexy questions!  To see who else participated this week, visit Twitter and search for #FormspringFriday!

Flash Fiction Friday: A Pretty Face

(Source image: "Hillary" by Bradley Thurber)

He acknowledged the absurdity of requesting admission to his own car, especially since he was holding the keys.  But each time he unlocked the door – going on two hours now – she locked it again.

Demanding that she let him in hadn’t worked.  Though he knew she’d be able to detect the scent of desperation, he adopted a conciliatory tone:  “Baby, please!  I’m already late for work!”

 “I’ll open up if you let me drive.”  He’d refused the first ten times she asked.  Now, though, he saw that it was the only way.  When he promised, she shook her head.  “Keys.  Now.”

He proffered his keys toward the open passenger window.  She snatched them and quickly started the car.  By the time he realized what was happening and made for the door handle, she was gone. (135/135)

Behind the Scenes 

This story was much easier to write than some I've done for Flash Fiction Friday.  On a couple occasions, I dated the kind of woman who might have locked herself in my car, cajoled me into relinquishing the key, and then driven off without me.  (No, that never actually happened.)  Because of this, I decided that rather than crafting a story about a guy who spends a carefree day tooling around the countryside in his impeccably-maintained 1952 Hudson Wasp with a beautiful, shapely woman in the passenger seat before pulling onto the side of a rural road for some sex, the story I told would be the exact opposite.  I'd question what that says about my attitudes toward women, but I have to think that anyone who's read this blog for any appreciable length of time knows that they're generally positive.

No, this dark story stemmed merely from a desire to think outside the box, so to speak.  My first thought upon seeing the prompt photo was that the girl depicted sure was pretty.  Dark, lush hair.  Attractive eyes.  Rich, red lips.  Sexy stockings and heels.  Bonus points for having her skirt hiked up a bit, revealing a lovely backside.  Numerous happy and sexy stories flashed in my brain as I took in the scene.  Ultimately I decided to go a different route.

The required phrase this week was "...the scent of [noun]..."  Rather than using an actual scent - perfume, the woman's hair, sweat after a particularly vigorous episode of backseat sex - I knew as soon as I decided which story I would tell that it would be a metaphoric scent.  Once I began writing, it was clear that I would refer to the scent of desperation.  The first draft of this story, in which I ran out of words three quarters of the way in, included the required phrase from the beginning, but I forgot about it when writing the final draft.  While proof-reading, Jill reminded me of the omission, and I had to trim a few words.

Deleted Scenes

None, though I can admit to having a difficult time making the story, as originally envisioned, fit within the 135-word allotment.  Certain bits of plot detail, notably why the male character didn't just open the driver's side door, push his girlfriend aside, and get in the car, had to be truncated or excised completely, as did mention of whichever deep-rooted self-respect issues made him powerless to demand better treatment.

Soundtrack

The song I heard in my head as I wrote was Johnny Rivers' 1966 hit "Secret Agent Man", specifically the line "A pretty face can hide an evil mind".  I even used a portion of that line for the title.  However, other than that line the song didn't fit.  Additionally, I considered Bel Biv DeVoe's 1990 song "Poison" as the line "Never trust a big butt and a smile" seemed to fit the story perfectly.  However, as a musical genre I don't think new jack swing fits either.  "Female of the Species", by Space, had already been used in a previous Flash Fiction Friday installment, and I saw no reason to repeat myself.  Since I keep coming back to guitar heavy rock, "Bad Girlfriend" by Theory of a Deadman, or "Crazy Bitch" by Buck Cherry would provide a suitable audio track.

If you'd like to take part in the fun, or see who else participated this week, check out Insatiabear.

The Naughty Hangout: Peace and Quiet

This week's secondary theme at The Naughty Hangout is "Desire".  As the title indicates, what I desire more than anything right now is peace and quiet.  My entire work day involves noisy children.  When I get home in the afternoon, my daughter is so excited to see me that she doesn't leave my side until bedtime.  This has been a difficult, hectic school year, and I look forward to summer when I'll have two months off.  My daughter won't be so clingy, and I won't be so desperate for a little "me" time.  

Yes, this is the same rocking chair featured in last week's Sinful Sunday.

This picture can also be seen as an interpretation of the primary theme, "Maturity", because I'm forty.

Go see who else is being naughty this week!

-Jill

Bedding Christine

Last week, I wrote about my former boss, Christine.  As I mentioned in the final paragraph of last week's post, Christine and I eventually gave into the sexual tension that I'd like to believe was simmering beneath the surface from the first day that we worked together.  Over the course of the past week, I felt as though I'd set up the pins but had yet to actually knock them down.  Because of this, I am going to tell that story today.

Two years after the incident I described in On a Break, I was twenty-six, on the cusp of twenty-seven.  I was single, my girlfriend and I having taken a permanent break, and I worked at a different job.  The specifics of that job are irrelevent, but it's worth mentioning that I was making less money, and for a couple months each year I would supplement my income by returning to my old job four nights a week in order to help Christine and company get through a particularly busy stretch.

One evening, while I was alone in the office, Christine called my cell phone.  She was at Costco picking up provisions for the next day's Executive Board meeting, and asked if I could help her unload her car when she arrived.  I said of course, and she asked if I needed her to pick up some fast food or anything.  I was touched by her offer - Christine was always very sweet - but I told her no thanks  as I'd picked up dinner on my way in.

Most evenings, the time flew by as Christine worked late right alongside me.  We'd talk shop, discuss movies we wanted to see, or rock out to Metallica and AC/DC right at our desks.  But for the past two weeks she'd been leaving work before I arrived.  In theory I enjoyed the solitude as it allowed me to work unfettered, but in reality it was boring and lonely.  Seeing another human being for even five minutes, while carrying cases of sodas and pallets of bottled water, was a nice diversion.

Forget sex; that hadn't even crossed my mind.  Yeah, I still had the hots for Christine, but rather than it being an everpresent phenomenon as it was when we worked together all day every day, my attraction to her had for the last couple years been on the back burner.  Besides,  at the moment I was hung up on a cute young barista who worked at the Starbucks a block from my apartment; Christine was, I'm sorry to say, old news.

But she didn't look like old news when she walked into the office and strolled across the common room.  Her brown hair was tied back in a pony tail, her eyes unobstructed.  Her lips were soft, shiny, and pink, curving upward into a pretty smile when she saw me.  Her expression was warm and inviting, more of a friend than a boss.  I asked her how she'd been.

"Not too bad," she said with a shrug.  "Things have been so hectic with the kids the last few nights."  Her tone changed to one of urgency, almost excitement:  "Oh!  You know Greg moved out, right?  Did I tell you?"  She had not, and I told her so.  "Yeah, three weeks ago.  We're taking some time apart."

"That sucks," I said, even as I realized that she didn't seem upset.

"It's just temporary, but we hope it'll be for the best."  She walked into her office, while I resumed my filing.  As I worked, she called out to me:  "Have the janitors been by yet?"

I leaned into her office doorway and replied that they had, about forty minutes earlier.  Christine stood in front of her window, closing the aluminum mini-blinds.  "Forty minutes," she said absently.  It didn't warrant a response so I didn't give one.  She turned to see me in the doorway and invited me in, adding, "You want to fuck?"

I hesitated a couple seconds before giving her a noncommital "Sure."  I didn't want to sound too eager, certainly not as eager as I felt.  I'm not sure why this was, but the last thing I was hoping to do was betray the reality that what I was thinking was more along the lines of a sure and gleeful "Hell yes." 

Christine wore a long-sleeved white sweater that flattered her curves and made her pillowy breasts stand out beautifully, and a pair of black jeans tucked into matching boots that reached mid-calf.  Not for long, though.

She spoke again:  "Turn off the lights."  This time without hesitation, I flipped the switch on the wall and Christine's office was suddenly dark.  The only real light came from the fluorescent fixtures on the common room ceiling, but for good measure I shut the door, leaving the room even darker.  Faint blades of dying daylight cut between the blinds, casting strips of vague illumination on Christine's desk and on the walls.  She gestured to her desk chair, and I sat.

My eyes adjusted to the darkness.  In front of me, Christine was a fuzzy specter, slowly lowering herself to her knees.  My cock sprang up as I felt her hand on my thigh, and she placed her other hand over it, cupping it and caressing it.  

"Is this okay?" she asked.  I was surprised by the question; I didn't expect her to second-guess herself.  I attempted to tell her that it was, but for some reason I couldn't make any words happen.  Christine took my silence as tacit approval, and opened my jeans.  Her grip was confident, firm but not tight and certainly not uncomfortable.  She gave me a moment's worth of pumps, raising me to diamond-hardness, and then replaced her fingers with her tongue.  She licked with long, elaborate strokes, the sort with which a child might lick an oversized lollipop.  Even though it was almost totally dark in the room, I imagined her licks to be showy and exaggerated, even theatrical.  

She closed her mouth around the head of my cock and lowered her head, drawing in my length as deeply as she could.  I felt her nose press against my stomach, my cock reaching the very back of her throat.  She held this position for a few seconds, then came up for air gasping and panting.  In response, my cock throbbed for attention.  I took off my T-shirt and tossed it in the general direction of Christine's office door.  At the same time I felt her mouth once again encircle my head.  She sucked vigorously this time, her lips not reaching the base of my cock but instead moving faster, paying particular attention to the sensitive frenulum, and then my balls.

Christine worked her hands into my jeans, and with a tug she signaled that she wanted them gone.  I raised my ass off of her desk chair and she pulled my jeans to my feet, leaving them bunched up atop my shoes.  She gave me a few more licks, and took her mouth away.  I was disappointed momentarily, my mood lifting when I heard the clatter of her belt being unbuckled.  This was going to be very, very good.

I felt her bare legs against mine, and then her hands on my shoulders.  She drew her nails gently down my chest, then leaned close and pecked softly at my neck in the darkness.  Soon her lips found my own, kissing me with passion and desperation.  She clung to me like it was the end of the world.  Her lips tasted like wild cherry as her mouth opened, and her tongue felt just as good as it had on my cock.  I groped in the darkness for her full, generous breasts, feeling a surge of triumphant joy as I found them.  Her skin was soft, delicate like that of a ripe plum as I caressed them, my thumbs coming to rest on her nipples.  

She raised one leg onto the chair, and I felt her bare foot against my hip.  I wanted to caress her thigh, maybe find her pussy in the dark and see how wet she was, but I didn't.  As our kiss intensified, I hoped she would just get on the chair and straddle me, but she didn't.  Eventually she worked her leg behind my ass, and climbed up so that she was sitting on my knee.  She took my hand in hers and we traced a path down her stomach, coming to rest where her legs met.

I could feel her heat on my fingers as I deftly parted her lips, her wetness engulfing me.  I pressed two fingers into her as with my thumb I stroked her clit.  Christine still held my hand, now guiding me in order to show me exactly what she liked.  She moved her hips in time to my rhythm, the intensity of our dance growing by the second.

"Do you have a condom?" she asked when our lips had finally parted.

"Yeah, I said, trying to think of a way to gracefully retrieve my wallet from my jeans, still down at my ankles.

Christine dismissed my efforts, fumbling on her desk for her purse.  Mere seconds passed before I was wrapped in latex and deep inside her, her ass bucking up and down against me as she rode each upward thrust.  She was energetic, and had no problem taking what she wanted.  She asked me to stroke her clit again, and the sounds she made told me that my efforts weren't wasted.

The first time she came, she nestled her head against my shoulder, burying her mouth in my neck to stifle her cries.  Her pussy clenched around my cock as her body rocked slowly against my own.  She undulated against me, and soon she was climaxing again.  By her fourth, she was sucking my neck insistently, and when she had her fifth, I came right alongside her.  I wasn't expecting that.  My groans were deep and intense, cacophonous yet somehow in harmony with Christine's own sounds of release.

She remained astride me as we caught our breath, then returned her mouth to my neck.  Her kisses were gentler now, like a gazelle grazing in a field.  I felt beads of sweat dripping from my forehead into my eyes and down my nose, and I tried to shake them off without distracting Christine from what she was doing.  She stopped kissing my neck and kissed my mouth instead.  I held her close, feeling her breasts against me, our hearts beating more or less in sync.

Finally, she spoke:  "That was fucking great."

Though Christine and I maintained a working relationship for a couple more years, that was the only time we ever had sex.  I often wish I'd gotten to lay Christine in a bed, or maybe on a sofa or some other place more comfortable than her desk chair in total darkness.  In fact, maybe I should have titled this post "Desking Christine".

Retro HNT: Upper Half

"Upper Half", posted June 24, 2010

In 2010, we posted fifty-two consecutive weeks of pictures at OHNT.  We're posting them on our blog, one per week.  They can be found here, along with background information and all the comments they received.

TMI Tuesday: May 22, 2012 - The Inverted Poll

This TMI Tuesday is brought to you by Virtual Sin.

Oh. You didn’t mean inverted pole dancing? 

In many polls, you are asked if you strongly agree, somewhat agree, neither agree nor disagree, somewhat disagree or strongly disagree with some proposition. Today, we go the other way. We supply the answer, you supply the question.

Jack's Answers

1. Tell us something with which you strongly agree, or greatly like.

I strongly agree that sex is a normal, natural part of human development, and therefore something that should be embraced.  Sex is healthy and positive, and there is no reason for the inexplicable taboo that surrounds it.  The right-wing nutbags who are so vehemently against sex while at the same time so pro-Jesus should understand that sex is our God-given right, and that the God they profess to love so much invented the clitoris - and slapped one onto every female He supposedly created - for the sole purpose of sexual pleasure.  Seriously - there isn't a damn thing procreative about the clitoris.  What do you have to say about that, Rick Santorum?

"Clitoris?  I'm sorry, but I'm unfamiliar with that term."

2. Tell us something with which you somewhat agree, or somewhat like.

I somewhat like pie.  I'm not crazy about it; I doubt it would rank among my top five favorite desserts.  But if it's offered at a dinner party or some manner of social gathering and there doesn't happen to be any ice cream, I'll graciously take a slice of pie, and I'll probably enjoy it, even if it's not the wisest use of the calories.

My all-time favorite dessert?  Vagina cookies.

3. Tell us something to which you are indifferent, or have no opinion.
Manholes.  I understand that they serve a purpose in society, but if they affect my life at all, they do so in ways I can't even perceive.

I know C.H.U.D.s use manholes to come to the surface, but that doesn't necessarily make me dislike them.

4. Tell us something with which you somewhat dislike or disagree with.
Now, I don't want to get off on a rant here, but I was a huge fan of Dennis Miller going back to his tenure on Saturday Night Live.  I was one of only four viewers who tuned in to his syndicated late-night talk show that aired in 1992.  Two years later I followed him to HBO where I was smitten with his sensible libertarian views (he stated in the wake of U.S. Surgeon General Joycelyn Elders' 1995 dismissal that "a surgeon general who speaks her mind about sex education, teen pregnancy, and preventative health care doesn't deserve to be surgeon general, she deserves to be the fucking President of the United States"), as well as the same smart-assed demeanor I'd come to enjoy on Saturday Night Live, here aided and abetted by copious usage of the word "motherfucker".  His vulgarity earned him the ire of conservative groups, some of which accused him of being a liberal - something that Dennis certainly was not.  Despite the fact that he frequently sided with Gingrich against Clinton, many of Dennis' opinions and indeed the intelligence of his humor made me even more of a die-hard fan than I already was.  In fact, I was such a fan that I found myself defending Dennis to friends and relatives during his ill-advised stint co-hosting Monday Night Football in 2000 and 2001.  And then the Towers fell, and Dennis took a hard right turn, shifting from championing a hypothetical female president (just not Hillary) and ranting against "rich, white, entitled, scotch-drinking, secretary-chasing old-school hacks" to swearing fealty to one of the richest, whitest, most entitled hacks ever to befoul the Oval Office.  Dennis' comedy went from literate and thoughtful to reactionary and racist.  He regressed from a comedian to a right-wing pundit, a wannabe shock jock who aspired to the clueless bombast of a Don Imus and the hate-rhetoric of a Michael Savage.  While I suspect that some of Dennis' views on social issues still correspond with my own, and while I may rewatch a recording of his HBO show or an old Weekend Update segment on Saturday Night Live, there's nothing Dennis is likely to do in the future that will be fit for human consumption.  Of course, that's just my opinion.  I could be wrong.

What happened to you, Dennis?  You used to be cooler than Fonzie and the other side of the pillow combined.  Now you're Ann Coulter's cabana boy.

5. Tell us something with which you strongly disagree, or greatly dislike.

I disagree that my marriage, divorce, affair, abortion, addiction, faith, or lack of faith is any of your business.

Bonus: What is an opinion held by others that makes you angry?

That sex is only for procreation; that anything sexual enjoyed by two consenting adults of any gender is wrong, immoral, or unlawful (with the possible exception of cannibalism); that fundamental human rights should not be enjoyed by 100% of the world's population.

Jill's Answers

1. Tell us something with which you strongly agree, or greatly like.

I strongly agree with the Golden Rule, and I do my best to live my life by it.  I believe that you should treat others the way you wish to be treated.  You should set the example that you would like others to follow.  But the reverse is also true:  If I or someone else treats you kindly, or with respect, you should reciprocate in kind.  The Golden Rule extends to the way I raise my daughter.  By my actions I demonstrate right or wrong, and hopefully she follows my lead.

Not what I was referring to.

2. Tell us something with which you somewhat agree, or somewhat like.

I agree somewhat with the values I was taught growing up in the Catholic church.  That is to say, I selectively retain some of what I was taught, while ignoring the things that don't suit me, specifically those things I know to be contrary to my own beliefs.  I feel that people should respect others.  I feel that people should be honest.  I believe that family is important, and that one should respect and honor one's parents (provided that they're not abusers).  I believe in community, and I do my best to give back to the community in which I grew up.  However, this is really where the church and I part company.  I don't believe that most of the choices people make with their own lives are the business of anyone but themselves.  I don't believe that LGBT individuals are somehow evil or immoral, or that they should be shunned.  I don't even believe in the "hate the sin, not the sinner" bullshit that seems to be a popular thing for religious people to say these days.  I do not feel that women who get abortions are bad people or that they're going to Hell, if Hell even exists.  I don't believe that a child who dies without having been baptised will go to Hell (again, if Hell exists).  The concept of original sin is like manufacturing a computer that's full of viruses just so the purchaser will have to pay for expensive anti-virus software forever.  

In this analogy, the Pope is Bill Gates.

3. Tell us something to which you are indifferent, or have no opinion.
I don't care at all about reality television and I do my best to avoid it.  I don't partake in conversations about it at work.  It makes me weep to hear that people I look up to, people I respect and admire, are hooked on Big Brother, The Bachelor, Celebrity Apprentice, Real Housewives of Wherever the Fuck, Who Wants to Pimp My Mom, Jon and Kate, and The Show With Little People Who Have Normal-Sized Children.  I don't give a shit about the Kardashians, or Snooki's baby daddy, and in fact I'm a little bit ashamed that I even know that Snooki is pregnant.  On the other hand, I kind of like that show Chopped, with four different chefs competing to make a unique dish out of the same ingredients.

4. Tell us something with which you somewhat dislike or disagree with.

I somewhat disagree with the way the parents of my students are raising them.  It seems like parents today feel that they can't discipline their children, even verbally.  Because of the threat of C.P.S., they let their kids do whatever they want, including but not limited to misbehaving, acting disrespectful and even violent, and essentially walking all over them.  I disagree with the belief that I am supposed to teach my students manners because their parents can't be bothered or don't know how.  I disagree with the idea that I should have to deal with the psychological and emotional issues that bad parenting caused, and the behavioral problems that bad parenting enabled.  I disagree that I am supposed to be a psychiatrist, a nurse, a referee, and a zookeeper in addition to being a teacher.  Actually, you know what?  I don't disagree with this somewhat.  I disagree with this pretty strongly.  Unfortunately question #5 was the first one I answered, so when I got to this question I had to dial down my vehemence.

5. Tell us something with which you strongly disagree, or greatly dislike.

I strongly disagree that marriage is the right of only certain individuals.  I also strongly disagree that the government should have any say in the matter, nor should it be able to limit the rights afforded to married couples, including legal protection, insurance benefits and pension, family leave, hospital visitation, medical decision-making, the ability to file joint tax returns, and child custody.

Let's not forget the right to go on a national talk show and make an ass out of yourself. 

Bonus: What is an opinion held by others that makes you angry?
That if you enjoy sex, and if you're open to exploring different aspects of your sexuality beyond what mainstream society considers "normal", you deserve to be judged harshly.  That we should only fuck for procreation, under the covers, with the lights off, in the missionary position.  That sex is harmful or detrimental to a happy life, and those who take sexual initiative and deviate from the norm, whether by swinging, group sex, polyamory, exhibitionism and voyeurism, or simply having sex for the fun and the joy of it, you are a bad person.

How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Why Jack is the Way He is

In 2000, my friend Joan asked if she could interview me for her human sexuality class.  Her assignment was to examine a case study (i.e. me) and determine the extent to which the individual's sexual attitudes were shaped by social and environmental factors.  My reputation for being sex-positive was fairly well-known even in my early twenties, though I wouldn't have called myself "sex-positive".  Back then I was just a guy who liked sex.  Needless to say, I was happy to be her interviewee.

We met for drinks late one night after she'd gotten out of class.  She was married, and I got the distinct impression that her husband wasn't crazy about our friendship, though I later found out otherwise.  Such was my ego, I guess, that I thought every woman's spouse considered me a threat.  Which is not to say that I wanted to be a threat to anyone's marriage.  It didn't help that Joan spent the evening looking at the entrance to the bar.  I assumed she was paranoid that someone she knew would see her drinking with a guy who wasn't her husband.

The interview was fun.  Until then, I'm fairly certain that I'd never talked so openly about my sexual self with anyone, not even women I dated seriously.  I don't know what made opening up to Joan relatively effortless, though I'm guessing it had less to do with the fact that we were drinking than it did the fact that I had known her for more than a decade, and wasn't trying to get in her pants.  

A few weeks ago, I came across Joan's paper in a file folder overloaded with my old college homework assignments and papers.  I enjoyed reading it, as there were some details of my past that I'd actually forgotten about.  I am sharing it here for your reading enjoyment.  The footnotes are my own.

For this assignment, I have chosen to write about my friend Jack.  Like me, Jack was born and raised in the San Francisco Bay Area.  As an only child, his immediate family consisted only of his parents and himself.  However, during his youth and adolescence, Jack did have regular contact with aunts, uncles and cousins on both sides of his family.  Jack attended a Catholic preschool for two years, but the remainder of his education, from kindergarten through twelfth grade, was spent in public schools.

Jack’s religious training consisted of a mere two years of C.C.D, during which time he made his first confession, and received his First Holy Communion.  He has never made his Confirmation, a requirement of the Catholic Church.  His family attended church services semi-regularly during Jack’s childhood, although in his early adolescence and teenage years, his attendance waned, until by his own admission he only attended church for Easter and Christmas Eve masses.  Although currently living within walking distance of his local parish, he says that he has not attended mass in two years.

Jack believes that his exposure to religion, and Catholicism in particular, has definitely affected his sexual attitudes and values.  But rather than inhibiting him in any fashion, the repressive nature of the Catholic religion has only served to make him more aware of, and interested in, his sexuality.  “The Catholic Church is notorious for its reactionary outlook on human sexuality,” he says.  “The official position of the church prohibits everything except old-fashioned, lights-out, missionary position husband-and-wife sexual intercourse.  Sex that occurs for any reason beyond procreation is frowned upon.”  As a result of what he perceived as the church trying to implant guilt in individuals who simply want to enjoy themselves sexually, Jack vowed not to let anyone dictate the limits of his sexual expression.  When presented with a list of sexual practices the church frowns upon, Jack acknowledges that he has tried most of them.  “Except same-sex interaction,” he says, almost apologetically.  “For all my liberal sexual openmindedness, it’s not really my thing.”

During his youth and adolescence, Jack received expressions of affection from both of his parents.  His mother was better able to display emotions than his father, who was raised by parents who simply did not feel affection for one another, and thus did not show any.  He recalls seeing his parents hugging and kissing, and admits that this shaped his attitudes about romantic love.  However, in virtually all respects, his mother was the one who initiated such expressions.

Jack’s parents never spoke to him about sexuality, although this was not due to any unwillingness on their part.  When they tried to explain sexual intercourse with him (with Jack’s mother leading the talk), he refused to participate due to embarrassment.  Although unsure as to when this took place, he guesses that it was probably during elementary school.  At this time, he already had a good idea as to the generalities of sex, having learned as many children do from his peers at school.  He learned the specific details from library books read during his early adolescence.

During his earlier childhood, one clear message his parents tried to send him was that nudity was a bad thing.  They did this by forbidding him from watching any movies in which an actress appeared nude.  However, he did not accept this message, and realized not only that his parents must have been wrong, but that they were hypocrites, since they allowed him to watch movies with violent scenes.  Jack realized that his parents were simply not going to change their feelings about this matter, but he did not let their feelings influence his.  As he got older, he secretly sought out books and movies that contained female nudity in order to satisfy his curiosity.  Today, Jack seems to have no hang-ups regarding nudity, either his own or anyone else's.  

"It's not like the naked body is something that is inherently sexual," he says.  "I can see people having hang-ups about sex, because that's the culture we've created for ourselves.  But nudity has nothing to do with sex, really.  Sure, people are frequently naked when they have sex, but it's not an equation.  I understand that society says we have to cover up.  I get that.  But the notion that nudity is something to be ashamed of, or apologize for?  Or be squeamish about?  I'm not down with that.  I never will be."

As a child, Jack was aware of gender expectations and roles.  However, he did not feel constrained or limited by his gender, and consciously tried to override such programming in order to experience a fuller, more diverse life.  He played with action figures, enjoyed video games, and in social settings with other boys sometimes played more politically-correct variations of “Cowboys and Indians”.  He also spent time playing house with his female cousins.  Although he liked sports, one thing that Jack couldn’t fathom was the expectation that he constantly play football.  “I love watching it,” he says.  “But every time I went to a friend’s house between, say, fifth grade and eighth grade, they always wanted to play football.  It didn’t matter if there were two of us or six.  I was like, ‘Jesus, give it a rest!’”  

There was no sexual experimentation during this stage of Jack’s life.  Still a shy person by his own admission, during his early development Jack recalls wondering what it would be like to kiss a girl – although at this point he never thought about going any further.  He felt nervous and recalls being afraid that he wouldn’t know what to do.  As he entered puberty, Jack noticed the various body changes he had read about earlier, and had come to expect.  His feelings about the opposite sex gradually became more sexual in nature, and he discovered deliberate masturbation – as opposed to early childhood experimentation with the genitals – at age eleven.  At first he considered it simply an enjoyable practice.  It took him awhile to actively associate masturbation with the sexual feelings he had been feeling for some time.  He had his first orgasm from masturbation at age twelve.

Jack also places what he calls his first “real” kiss at age twelve.  The girl he kissed was a school friend who had expressed an interest in kissing him.  Excited, Jack obliged, though the kiss was simple and closed-mouthed.  When asked by the girl to “go steady”, Jack balked, citing the fact that they were twelve, he didn’t drive or live within walking distance, and therefore didn’t see any way of making a dating relationship work¹.  The first time he participated in sexual experimentation, he was fifteen years of age.  While making out with his then-girlfriend, she let him feel her breasts beneath her shirt and bra.  At the same time, she caressed him through his jeans, and the relationship progressed from there.  The two lost their virginity to each other the following year.  

“The first time was really exciting,” Jack says, somewhat wistfully.  “You know, we were sixteen.  As far as we were concerned, we were ready.”  Although neither he nor she knew as much about sex as they might have, or thought they did, it was an enjoyable experience for both.  In Jack’s opinion, having sex brought them closer together.   Although they had been dating for more than a year, Jack chose this occasion to finally tell her he loved her, something he had been aware of for some time.  He proudly states that they used protection every time they had sexual intercourse.  “I trusted her implicitly.  I didn’t think in a million years that she would ever cheat on me.  I just didn’t want her to get pregnant.” 

However, she did cheat on Jack, something that hurt him deeply.  Although their relationship was on-again, off-again for awhile, Jack cared about his girlfriend very much, and claims that he was entirely faithful to her.  When she admitted to having slept with other men while they were dating, he broke up with her on the spot.² This occurred just as Jack was entering college.

During his first year at junior college, Jack dated more frequently than he had in the past, and broadened his sexual horizons with several different women he met there.  With good humor, he admits that he cannot recall all of their names.  “I wasn’t looking for commitment at this point,” he says.  “I was totally jaded and the last thing I wanted was to be hurt again.  I wanted the sex.  Don’t get me wrong, I wanted to be loved.  But I was eighteen.  I wanted to get laid, and I didn’t want to have my heart broken again.”  

Jack continued having relatively loveless sex through his first year of college.  During his second year, he was reluctantly drawn into another relationship.  Although the relationship seemed to have potential initially, it was built primarily on sex.  Jack describes the woman as “crazy”, though he declines to elaborate.  “I’m no psychologist,” he says with a sigh.  “To the layperson, she was just crazy.”  Prompted, he suggests she may have been bipolar, though he admits to not knowing exactly what that means.  He confesses that he spent too much time with her, and after being hurt once again he fell back into the pattern in which he found himself after his earlier breakup.  Even more determined not to become emotionally involved with a woman, Jack resumed dating casually.

Last year, Jack met a woman in college.  They have been dating for “several months”.  Although I note that he has referred to this woman as his girlfriend twice, he’s not ready to classify this relationship as serious.  Time will tell if the “relationship followed by casual dating” pattern repeats itself yet again.  Jack notes that their dating relationship was not built on a foundation of immediate sex, but rather one of apparently-mutual respect.  They met in an English literature class, and found that they have some favorite authors in common.  They also share musical interests, and an enjoyment of cooking.  

Jack laments that he and his girlfriend – there’s that word again – do not have as much sex as either would like.  This is due not to any apparent sexual incompatibility or lack of desire, but rather to the fact that both live at home, and weigh themselves down with so many work and school obligations that they have difficulty setting aside sufficient quality “alone” time for themselves.  “That’s okay though,” he says confidently.  “Neither of us is complaining.”

He estimates that they have sexual intercourse on average of once or twice a week.  Since they live an hour apart, it is difficult for them to get together at opportune times.  Typically when they have sex, it occurs at Jack’s house.  The typical sex session lasts an hour or so, as his girlfriend inexplicably has a curfew.  On occasion they have an entire weekend to themselves, though such an arrangement requires that she lie to her parents about who she’s with.

The woman he has dating has tried using birth control pills, but had an adverse reaction to them.  She plans to talk to her doctor about depo provera, although Jack doesn’t know when that will happen.  In the meantime, they usually use condoms.  Jack admits to not using them with 100% regularity, and acknowledges the risk.  However, he feels like he can trust the woman he is with.  He is optimistic that his trust isn't misplaced.  

Jack considers his most enjoyable sexual experience to be the first time he had sex with a woman he met at junior college.  She was somebody who he had classes with during his first semester, and found immensely attractive.  During his second semester, he got to know her better, and eventually he entered into a brief sexual relationship with her.  He found that she possessed a tremendous sexual energy the likes of which he had never encountered before.  As he puts it, “She was a few years older than me, and she came across as very free-spirited and, for lack of a better word, wild.  I had all of these preconceptions about her sexually, and I was delighted to discover that they were very real.”

Although he is reluctant to classify any of his sexual experiences as being poor or negative, Jack considers one experience, with a girl he met in Southern California while on a trip, to be a bad one.  She was staying at the same hotel where his mother was having business meetings all weekend, and the two spent the majority of their time together in her room, exploring their sexuality.  Jack enjoyed the sex, but considers it a bad experience because he finds it depressing in retrospect.³  “We used each other, pure and simple.  I don’t even remember her name.”  At the time, he recalls that the casual encounter was a tremendous ego boost.

When asked about his favorite fantasy, Jack says without hesitation, “Having a threesome with two women.”  He has fantasized about such a scenario for years, and says that several of the women he has had sex with were interested in it as well, although nothing ever came of it.  His current girlfriend is sexually attracted to women, although she has not yet acted on this attraction.  Jack wonders if his threesome fantasy will finally come true.  He also wonders, when push comes to shove, if he actually wants it to come true.  He enjoys the fantasy, but for all he knows he might like it to stay that way.

In ten years, Jack considers that he would like his sex life to be as enjoyable as it is currently.  Regardless of whether or not he is in a sexual relationship, or just casually dating, he would like to be sexually active, and to have had a threesome, or some other variety of group sex.  

I believe that Jack's sexual attitudes were determined largely by his upbringing.  His adult sexual life was shaped not only did the positive aspects of his upbringing such as his parents' openly affectionate nature, but also the negative aspects such as exposure to the repressive nature of the Catholic church.  He is determined to fight such negativity and live his sexual life on his own terms.

I chose to interview Jack for this assignment because although we have been friends for twelve years, however, we have not had the opportunity or the need to explore our sexual histories with each other at length.  We had very little knowledge of each other sexually.  Because of this assignment, I learned a lot of things about Jack that I never would have guessed.  We have grown much closer than we ever were before.  At first, I was somewhat embarrassed about doing this project with Jack.⁴  However, his outgoing nature made it much easier for me.  He opened me up and made me feel comfortable in talking about my sexuality.  In addition, he was able to talk frankly about his own, and his sense of humor added a lot to the experience.  This assignment was fun.

¹I may have omitted the fact that I told the girl that she was too short for me.

²I may have also omitted the fact that I cheated on her as well, possibly before she cheated on me.

³I'm not certain why, at the time, I viewed this experience as depressing.  I suspect it has something to do with the fact that I was being unfaithful to my girlfriend.  I'm certain it wasn't because we used each other, or because I can't recall her name.  I've had many similar experiences since.  Maybe I classified the encounter as depressing to Joan so that she'd think I didn't like meaningless sex.

⁴She couldn't have been that embarrassed, considering that we've masturbated in close proximity to one another.